Good advice for visitors to Paris, or anywhere

Hopefully, the days of the Ugly American are long past. Remember those gold-chain wearing loudmouths whose behavior made you cringe, or tell the waiter you were Canadian? Our most recent encounter with the type was during breakfast at a cafe in the 7th arrondissement. One member of this group of six thought it would be fun to play a new, lewd country song on their phone loud enough for the rest of us to hear. Yuck!

Unfortunately, there still are a lot of travelers, and not just from the U.S., who want their French hosts (and I suppose it's the same if they're in Italy or Brazil) to behave like everyone at home, for example expecting waiters to fawn at their every whim - in English, of course. It makes you wonder why they don't go to Miami or, better yet, Kansas City, where they'd feel more comfortable.

Frederic prepares the dining room at Au Petit Panisse in Paris. He serves the whole restaurant of about 36 covers.

Enough complaining; it distracts from what we like, which includes finding places like Au Petit Panisse in the 11th arrondissement. This beautifully renovated space is lovingly run by Laurent and Frederic, who speak little English because they don't need to - nearly all of their clientele is local and the wonderful food they serve speaks for itself. While this place illustrates several of the points raised in this article about some cultural differences between France and the U.S. (and the UK, I think), it's a bit more boisterous than many French restaurants because, at least when we were there, it's such a magnet for families and groups of friends out to enjoy sharing a good meal and companionship.

The advice to greet shop staff upon entering is one I've tried to adopt at home as well. For most of my life I haven't been particularly nice to the people who stand behind the counters - part of that Ugly American attitude, I'm afraid - so I'm glad to have learned to be more polite. Actually, choosing to be polite and patient rather than gruff will go a long way in France or anywhere else in Europe. It may seem a little stuffy to Americans, but "please" and "thank you" along with respect for others no matter their station in life touch on many of the principles of social interaction there.

By the way, add "monsieur," "madame" or madamoiselle to your bonjour, and say "au revoir" or "bonne journee" when leaving.

I'm sure our friend Winnie greeting this salt vendor in the market with a hearty "bonjour monsieur."

We prefer staying in apartments rather than hotels in part so that we can immerse ourselves in a neighborhood, "living there" for several days or weeks and getting to know local shops and cafes. Of course, we also like to save money and have space and comforts not found in hotel rooms we could afford.

This apartment in the 11th is within a short walk of Au Petit Panisse and even closer to better-known restaurants such as Bistrot Paul Bert. It's cozy, but comfortable for two, and quiet as it is set within a courtyard.

The living room is bright as it is on a high floor and has a large window.

Or you could stay across town at this apartment in the residential 15th arrondissment. It's not far from the market shown above and surrounded by family run cafes and shops.

There's a queen bed and two singles in the living area.

At around 100 euros per night for two, these apartments are good values, comfortable and put guests in lively, intriguing neighborhoods while still being close to transportation that makes it easy to reach other parts of Paris.

See more examples of vacation rental apartments in Paris and Barcelona at www.likelivingthere.com, or drop us an email with your plans and preferences at info@likelivingthere.com and we'll respond with suggestions.